The Frudtrations of Parenting & Teaching

At times, the task of teaching and parenting is draining.  Our children and our students push the boundaries frequently and our job can seem so difficult.

I have found it helpful to consider how God 'parented' and taught Adam and Eve when they sinned.  Did he yell and scream at them?  Did he accuse them and lecture them? 

The poem below was written as a reflection about God's responses to the disappointments of his own children, and remind us that, in fact, we are all in the same 'boat' as our children.  We can recall that, even with perfect Parent/Teacher, Adam and Eve still made poor choices!

As adults we struggle with temptation too.  We are in need of forgiveness, and in need of restored relationship.  If we can respect our children in the way we seek to be respected, and seek to respond to them as we believe God responds to us, we can work towards a healthy environment in which we can all grow.  So, in fact, the very role of parenting/teaching is part of our own growth in maturity and dependence on him, and a recognition that, though our parenting/teaching is not perfect, God's grace is with us in the task.

 
The Pain of Parenthood
Many years ago a Father muttered under his breath as he looked at his children:

"Come on guys!  I've worked for days to provide your every need!
And you still want more, and think you're poor: your eyes are tinged with greed.

I gave my blessing on your life and made the boundaries plain.
I told you what would happen if temptation wasn't tamed.
I gave you loving peer support.  You knew that I was near,
But fear of missing out on more is a perilous type of fear.
The advert said you weren't fulfilled till you tasted of its fruit.
He told you lies, deceit disguised.  You listened to the brute."

The Father, disappointed now, considered what to do.
He didn't accuse or offer excuse or ask why or when or who.
He moved toward them in their guilt - he just happened to be around.
He asked, "Have you disobeyed Me?  I miss that cheerful sound."
He didn't accept excuses, but sadly followed through,
For separation comes from sin, whatever else you do.

That Father's children were immature and needed a fresh new start.
They needed to learn to walk with Him, to love and obey from the heart.
The Father committed to His children and promised to be on their side.
He promised to give them His blessing, if they'd obey Him as their guide.
He gave them the rules and the boundaries to teach them to live and to love
And promised a hope and a future if they walked in the ways from above.

Those kids were a source of frustration - some listened, but most disobeyed.
They certainly mocked expectations - they regularly wandered and strayed.
Some of them had all the answers - the rules and the laws all off pat.
They were proud of the truth they imparted, but the Father sought much more than that.

He wanted them grownups not children, so He sent their big brother to guide -
To show them the way to maturity was, in faith, to walk by His side.

They deserved to be left in rejection for their selfishness, bickering and strife
But the brother came in to their rescue - for His siblings He laid down His life.
So - humbled now, fully, and crippled with shame, some children slowly acknowledged their blame.
And knowing the rules were just the beginning, took on a different view of their sinning.
They started to see it's a human condition.  To conquer it alone is too big a mission.
No matter how perfect the parenting might be, we - none of us - have the power to be free.

While children we're just like a slave - poor and lowly. 
We're rich in the bank, but maturing so slowly.
We're bound in the basics, keeping rules on our own
Not living as heirs to a wealthy One's throne.

Now, God's shown us since Adam the keys to keep growing.
Sure - commitment to Him and the rules He was showing…
But the rules are our teacher.  It doesn't stop there!
We need faith in forgiveness or we stand alone - bare.
Our faith is in Jesus, God's first-born son
It's His work that cleanses, and not what we've done.
We must submit to His discipline, feed on His Word,
Endure all the growing pains, share what we've heard.
We can walk in His Spirit, hearing His voice,
Seeking to make His purpose our choice.

He wants us to grow up in all aspects in Him, set free from our slavery, partners with Him.
Through faith we're made blameless, no wrinkle or spot,
And He wants us to use every thing that He's got.
We're His children, we're heirs, we're a Bride to His Son.
The Word of this Father is freedom -
So...Come!

Helen Pearson, 2005